What causes a leader to lose credibility in a meeting, conversation, or high-pressure leadership moment?

It is not always a lack of intelligence. It is not always a lack of experience. It is not always a lack of authority.

Sometimes it is a small communication habit that quietly changes how people perceive you.

In this episode of the Mason Duchatschek Show, Mason talks with Dr. Liz DuBois Erskine, a PhD conflict analyst and executive coach, about the leadership behaviors that influence how seriously someone is taken in the room.

The conversation covers executive presence, workplace conflict, people pleasing, burnout, over-apologizing, over-explaining, and what leaders can do when they realize they are consistently being undervalued.

For business owners, CEOs, executives, HR leaders, sales managers, and team leaders, this episode offers practical insight into a question that affects every workplace:

How do you communicate with more authority without becoming abrasive?

The Small Habit That Can Quietly Undermine Credibility

One of the first behaviors Dr. Liz calls out is over-apologizing.

Many leaders and professionals say “I’m sorry” automatically, even when they have not done anything wrong. They apologize when they need to pass someone. They apologize when someone waits a moment. They apologize before asking a question. They apologize before offering an opinion.

That may seem polite, but repeated unnecessary apologies can send the wrong signal.

There is a major difference between taking accountability and apologizing for existing.

A stronger alternative may be:

“Excuse me.”

“Thank you for your patience.”

“I appreciate you waiting.”

Those phrases still show respect, but they do not weaken your position in the conversation.

This matters because leadership communication is not only about what you say. It is also about what your words imply. When someone repeatedly apologizes for taking up space, they may unintentionally communicate that they are unsure whether they belong in the room.

Accountability Builds Respect Faster Than Defensiveness

One of the strongest moments in the conversation is Dr. Liz’s example of a leader who handles criticism with immediate accountability.

Instead of defending, explaining, or shifting blame, he simply says:

“I was wrong.”

That kind of direct ownership can instantly lower tension.

In leadership, defensiveness often keeps conflict alive. Accountability does the opposite. It gives people less to fight against because the leader is not arguing with reality.

For business owners and executives, this is a valuable reminder. Strong leadership does not require pretending to be right all the time. It requires the maturity to own mistakes quickly and move the conversation toward resolution.

A leader who can say, “That was on me,” often earns more respect than one who works too hard to protect their image.

Stop Trying to Prove You Are the Smartest Person in the Room

Another credibility trap Dr. Liz identifies is the urge to prove intelligence.

Some leaders over-explain because they want others to see their expertise. They use too much language, add too much context, and unintentionally make the message harder to understand.

The result?

People may walk away confused instead of convinced.

Dr. Liz refers to the importance of the “what’s in it for me” factor. In other words, the person you are speaking with needs to understand why the idea matters to them.

That applies to sales conversations, employee communication, client proposals, leadership meetings, and change management.

The goal is not to sound impressive. The goal is to be understood.

A clear message builds more trust than a complicated one.

What to Do When You Are Interrupted or Talked Over

Being interrupted can be frustrating, especially when it happens repeatedly. The instinct may be to call it out sharply.

But Dr. Liz makes an important distinction between accusation and invitation.

An accusation sounds like:

“You’re talking over me.”

An invitation sounds like:

“I have something I’d like to clarify. Can you hold off for just a second while I finish my thought?”

The second option still sets a boundary, but it reduces the chance of escalating the situation unnecessarily.

This is especially relevant for leaders navigating tense meetings, cross-functional conflict, sales discussions, or workplace environments where power dynamics are at play.

The goal is not to avoid standing up for yourself. The goal is to reset the conversation in a way that helps you regain the floor without losing the room.

Avoided Conflict Does Not Disappear

Leaders sometimes avoid conflict because they want to preserve peace.

The problem is that unresolved conflict rarely stays hidden.

Dr. Liz explains that when conflict is swept under the rug, people usually know something is wrong. The unresolved issue creates tension, uncertainty, and anxiety. Employees may start tiptoeing around the problem, waiting for it to blow up.

That creates two problems instead of one:

The original conflict still exists.

Now the team is also dealing with the stress of avoidance.

For business owners, CEOs, and managers, this has real operational consequences. Avoided conflict can damage trust, slow decision-making, reduce engagement, and create unnecessary drama inside the organization.

Addressing conflict early may feel uncomfortable, but the cost of avoidance is often higher.

What If You Are Being Undervalued?

One of the deeper parts of the conversation focuses on what happens when someone realizes they are consistently being undervalued.

Dr. Liz shares the story of a client in a male-dominated field who was carrying a workload far beyond the industry standard. When she asked for support, she was told she was doing a great job, but nothing changed.

That feedback sounded positive, but it did not solve the problem.

Eventually, the client had to examine why she was tolerating the situation in the first place. Once she changed what she was willing to accept, she was able to make an external move to a better opportunity with a more appropriate workload, higher pay, and a stronger title.

The lesson is powerful.

Sometimes the first shift is internal.

Before a leader can change how others value them, they may need to change what they are willing to tolerate.

Why Coaching Can Change the Trajectory

When Mason asks Dr. Liz for one key piece of advice, her answer is simple:

Hire a coach.

Dr. Liz explains that coaching helped change the trajectory of her business and personal life. The right coach, mentor, or advisor can help leaders see patterns they may not recognize on their own.

That is especially important for high performers who are used to figuring things out alone.

A coach can help leaders identify blind spots, sharpen communication, improve decision-making, and challenge the beliefs that keep them stuck in unhealthy patterns.

For leaders dealing with people pleasing, burnout, conflict avoidance, or feeling undervalued, outside perspective can be extremely valuable.

Leadership Credibility Is Built in Small Moments

This episode is a reminder that executive presence is not only built through big speeches, major decisions, or formal authority.

It is built in small moments:

How you respond to criticism.

How you handle interruptions.

How clearly you communicate value.

How quickly you address conflict.

How often you apologize when no apology is needed.

How much you tolerate before deciding something needs to change.

Business owners and CEOs often focus on strategy, sales, operations, and growth. Those are critical. But leadership communication influences all of them.

The way a leader communicates affects trust, accountability, morale, retention, and performance.

Small habits can create major consequences.

Listen to the Full Conversation

In the full episode, Mason Duchatschek and Dr. Liz DuBois Erskine go deeper into leadership communication, executive presence, workplace conflict, people pleasing, burnout, and how to be taken seriously without becoming abrasive.

Listen to the full podcast audio:
https://open.acast.com/public/streams/5cd334e4e3b953af742edd5d/episodes/6a297ce732e30dceaf0b2623.mp3

Watch the full conversation on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hifyNqk-KI

About Dr. Liz DuBois Erskine

Dr. Liz DuBois Erskine is a PhD conflict analyst and executive coach who helps high performers break patterns of people pleasing, burnout, and fear of judgment. Her work focuses on executive presence, conflict, leadership communication, and helping professionals redefine success beyond hustle culture.

Website: https://coachdrliz.com/

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